If I should die…

One of the clearest and best military bloggers I’ve read during this war is Andrew Olmsted. A true citizen-soldier, Andrew’s beliefs and actions came from deep conviction and careful thought. He did not take lightly his decision to volunteer for active service, and he knew he would almost certainly be sent to Iraq.

He was killed there two days ago.

I still can’t believe how shocked and saddened I am. This is the way of war: People die. Thousands and tens of thousands of them, but each one makes it new again. I am a stranger who simply admired his writing; I can’t imagine the pain and grief his family must feel.

Andy left a blog post to be published in the event of his death. It’s typical Andy: Blunt, funny, geeky, and opinionated. You gotta love a man who can quote Wedding Crashers, The Princess Bride, and Babylon 5 in his self-obituary.

It must be an amazingly strange thing to write your farewell letter. Andy’s ranged from the personal to the worldly, with time for jokes and admonitions:

But on a larger scale, for those who knew me well enough to be saddened by my death, especially for those who haven’t known anyone else lost to this war, perhaps my death can serve as a small reminder of the costs of war.

Regardless of the merits of this war, or of any war, I think that many of us in America have forgotten that war means death and suffering in wholesale lots. A decision that for most of us in America was academic, whether or not to go to war in Iraq, had very real consequences for hundreds of thousands of people. Yet I was as guilty as anyone of minimizing those very real consequences in lieu of a cold discussion of theoretical merits of war and peace. Now I’m facing some very real consequences of that decision; who says life doesn’t have a sense of humor?

But for those who knew me and feel this pain, I think it’s a good thing to realize that this pain has been felt by thousands and thousands (probably millions, actually) of other people all over the world. That is part of the cost of war, any war, no matter how justified. If everyone who feels this pain keeps that in mind the next time we have to decide whether or not war is a good idea, perhaps it will help us to make a more informed decision.

This may be a contradiction of my above call to keep politics out of my death, but I hope not. Sometimes going to war is the right idea. I think we’ve drawn that line too far in the direction of war rather than peace, but I’m a soldier and I know that sometimes you have to fight if you’re to hold onto what you hold dear.

But in making that decision, I believe we understate the costs of war; when we make the decision to fight, we make the decision to kill, and that means lives and families destroyed. Mine now falls into that category; the next time the question of war or peace comes up, if you knew me at least you can understand a bit more just what it is you’re deciding to do, and whether or not those costs are worth it.

posted by Sra. Bibliotecaria ⋅ tagged america, war

One response to “If I should die…”

1. December 31st, 2008 at 11:22 am , Unschooled » Blog Archive » In a minute says:
   

   [...] Almost exactly a year ago, Maj. Andy Olmsted died in Iraq. [...]